For some Chinese youth, 'virtual parents' are an antidote to loneliness
In a world where technology often mirrors our deepest desires, a unique trend has emerged among the youth of China: 'virtual parents'. These online figures, often portrayed as middle-aged couples, offer a comforting presence to those feeling the weight of societal pressures and familial expectations. This phenomenon is particularly intriguing, as it taps into a deep-seated need for connection and understanding, especially for those navigating the complexities of modern life.
One such individual is Vincent Zhang, a tech worker in Shanghai. During mealtimes, he engages with his 'virtual parents' through his phone, receiving a stream of warm words and encouragement. The couple's videos, which are popular on Douyin (China's TikTok), often feature them cooing over the camera, expressing empathy and support. The comments section becomes a space for followers to share their lives and seek birthday blessings, fostering a sense of community and connection.
The creators of these 'virtual parent' accounts, Pan Huqian and Zhang Xiuping, have garnered nearly two million followers. Their popularity stems from their ability to resonate with young Chinese people who are squeezed between the pressure to succeed and the expectations of their families. Vincent shares his experience, noting that his biological parents rarely offer the same level of emotional support. He finds solace in the virtual relationship, where the 'parents' ask about his happiness, a stark contrast to the criticism and stress he experiences from his real-life parents.
Pan, the vlogger, reveals a personal connection to this trend. He left home at 14 to support his family after his mother became paralysed, facing a difficult childhood. This background influences his content, as he aims to create a nurturing family atmosphere for his daughter, regularly featuring her in their videos. This desire to provide a different experience for his child is a common thread among many 'virtual parent' creators.
The appeal of 'virtual parents' extends beyond the emotional support they offer. For Vincent, the weekly calls with his 'parents' provide a sense of nostalgia, reminding him of a simpler time spent with his biological parents. However, he also acknowledges the commercial aspect of the trend, suggesting that the vloggers may be mass-producing content for profit. Despite this, he finds comfort in the warmth and connection, believing it to be better than no support at all.
This trend reflects a broader reckoning among young Chinese people about parenting and the complexities of familial relationships. The discussions range from controlling parents to the pressure to excel academically, often leading to viral memes like 'gourd soup literature'. These memes satirize the dynamic where parents ignore their children's wishes, claiming to act in their best interest. Zhao Xuan, a 28-year-old, has muted her family group chat due to the overwhelming amount of 'gourd soup literature' from her parents, turning to memes for comfort and humor.
The 'virtual parent' trend is more than just a social media phenomenon; it's a response to the challenges of modern life. It offers a unique form of connection and support, especially for those feeling isolated or misunderstood. As the trend continues to evolve, it raises questions about the role of technology in human relationships and the potential for online interactions to provide genuine emotional fulfillment.
